I don't know where to start with this page. It is just as hard as any other page from the onion, I suppose. Due to all of the divorces and remarriages, my family turned out to be quite large. My mom was married four times and my dad has been married five times. The last count prior to dads' current remarriage, I have (between one real brother, half brothers, step brothers, half sisters, and step sister) fifteen brothers and sisters. There are only two couples in the family on my moms' side of the family that have not been divorced, and almost an equal ratio (90%) marriages ending in divorce on my dads' side. That includes great-grandparents, grandparents, uncle, aunts, cousins, nephews, brothers, & sisters. I'm starting to believe that divorce is a family trait.

I am not going to spend too much time on the "family tree" at this time. You can find that information on some following pages (when I get them started). I am going to talk some about the things and events that had the greatest impact on the family as I see it. If you would like more on family history, there were two books written that cover that better than I could here. One of the books was written by Effie DeForest Boyer Knowlton in the earlier part of the last century and published in 1992. The book is called "Tales from a Tahuya Log". The next book "Second Growth," was written and published by Helen Olsen in 2000. These books mainly cover the life and times on the Hood Canal in Washington State, just after the turn of the century. I found them to be quite interesting with their reflections of growth from days where the only transportation there was either by boat, horse, or hiking to the mid-century era.

The biggest influence on my most the immediate family has been by my first step-dad. So I will start there. Many years back, he and his family were in a car wreck involving an oncoming drunk driver that crossed the lane causing a head on collision. His wife was killed. He, his oldest son and daughter were injured pretty badly. His youngest son was not expected to live due to his skull which was broken and the halves overlapping from the impact amongst other damage. He regained his health the best that nerve damage would allow...partial paralysis, and retardation. They all regained their health as best they physically could. Their emotional health is still an obstacle and a strong influence on all around them.

About a year or two years later he married my mom. At this time, my mom had already been married twice, so I had one half-brother older than me and my only full brother is eleven months younger than me. I was going on five years old when they were married. Even at that early age, I remember allot of what went on in the family. It would be best not to reflect much of the details, but I will say that my step dad turned out to be very abusive. At times, he took great pride in being that way too. It was not until, much later on in life that I realize his attitude was just an expression of grief and animosity resulting from that car wreck. I want you to know that my attitude toward him now is one of empathy. I took allot of effort, soul searching, and self-sacrifice on my part to be able to accomplish that perspective. Now I will tell you some of the reasons why.

Within the first year of the marriage, I recall my mom being involved with fist fights with him and with his oldest son. Also in that same year, for entertainment purposes I suppose, nightly after work he would force my brother and I to box/fight. He would invite his brother over to watch too. As you may have guessed, my brother and I do not get along very well at times as a result of this. But the physical actions did not have nearly the effect as the mental abuse encountered from him. Within his ability (influence by underlying grief), he favored his own children & nurtured them to some degree. His attitude toward my moms' kids was, however quite different. I am not going to say that "it seemed", it is a fact that when he noticed that we (my brothers and I) were developing some sort of self-esteem, he would do his best to undermine it. I don't know how many times he attempted to break our spirits, and at times, succeeded.

One more thing that my real dads side of the family does not know is that name that I went by was "Joe Smith". My step-dad had me use that name for easier identification within the family. His oldest son is named John. My name is John too. My real last name is not Smith, by the way. In my youth, I was very interested in science and I made a scrapbook of science related notes news clippings and pictures. When he saw that I put my real name on the book, he punched me in the stomach. He was six feet tall and weight approximately 250 pounds with hardly an ounce of fat. Needless to say he make quite an impact on me. That was the last straw. I lost any respect that I had for him and what was his for several years.

I stayed in the family until I was in the ninth grade in school. I figured it was time to leave it all behind and move out, when he instigated another fight with my mom. She would confront him occasionally when she caught him harassing me. In this case, it was my daily task/"chore" to provide dry, seasoned wood for use in the furnace from our stock which was stored next to the house, uncovered and often exposed to the rain. After using all of the seasoned wood, all that was left was "green" wood. Frequently, he would jump on my case about not putting enough effort in to providing dry wood. I tried to get it across to him that there was none left in storage. He figured that I was lying or something. Anyway, he became very threatening over time. That is when mom got involved. When she tried to reason with him, but it turned into another fistfight. After that, I made arrangements to leave home, go live with my grandparents, finish high school, and started using my real name.